Ah, Regret.

On Motherhood (lezzie-style)
Mon, 8 September 2008, 4:07 pm
Filed under: Lezzie Celebs, Required Reading | Tags: , , ,

Ellen and Portia talk babies

Apparently Ellen and Portia have talked about having kids.  Must be that “maternal instinct” thingy I keep hearing about.  (Who knows, maybe one day preggo lesbos will be cooler than preggo tweens!  But um… although the allure of being cool has influenced me to do many things, I remain unconvinced that it would get me to hop on the baby bandwagon.)  So what baby names have they thrown around?

“We’ve thought of names, ironically … Jumbo Shrimp is good,” the talk show host tells Extra

That would actually be par for the course for celeb baby names…

Recently DeGeneres spent time with pals Gwen Stefani and Gavin Rossdale’s growing family – including their newborn son Zuma Nesta Rock Rossdale – which inspired some parental-ish feelings for the comedian. “I was holding Zuma this weekend. And all I kept doing was [singing] ‘All I want to do is a Zuma Zuma zoom and shake your rump.”

DeGeneres’s alternate plan to having kids is to adopt – but not just anyone. “I would adopt the Jonas Brothers,” she quipped. “They really are good kids. They appreciate everything still.” 

Ellen, adopt me!  I’m a good kid!!!! Right Big Al?


OK FYNE Ellen, you win, marriage is cool and I’m sorry for ever being surly about it!

Actual lesbians get married. Hurrah.

Sapphic marriage is all the rage these days, eh?

It does seem like a rainbow-puking good time, but I’m still ambivalent about the whole thing. Teh gayz should have the same rights as the latent homosexuals, er I mean straights, but what’s so great about marriage anyway? I guess there’s the allure of becoming a ’50s housewife bitch. But with Erin constantly demanding that I make her a sandwich, I already am that person (don’t be jealous). On the other hand, lesbians are known for their love of commitment, so why not get it in writing? Plus, alcohol-soaked wedding receptions (is that redundant to say?) are awesome and full of regret just waiting to happen. And I like rings.

Well perhaps I’ll wait it out and see whether gay divorce is cool or not. (I’m sorry, was that a surly, lumpy thing to say?) And if I ever do agree to participate in the Sacrament of Holy Gay Matrimony you’d better believe I’m going to go back and delete this post and pretend it never happened.