Ah, Regret.

Heather, is this what you’ve become?

me:  i love how when heather ghchats these days, she goes on sporadically, sends me something crazy (usually in caps), then suddenly signs off
we used to have conversations!
Colin:  now she is just like a lolcat with a blackberry


(Does Major Tom have a BlackBerry too?  Or does he just use yours and claw all of the keys off of it?)

Reason #118 you shouldn’t flatter old lesbians
Fri, 16 January 2009, 3:37 pm
Filed under: Gchatterbox | Tags: ,
me i dont think you’re fat!
Bondy will you marry me?

How the Dyke Stole Hxmas!

It has recently come to my attention (read: the office xmas tree just got assembled) that it is now officially that time of year known as “xmastime” (see Fig. 1 and Fig. 2).

[Fig. 1] Everyone else (who isn't Jewish or whatnot) at xmastime.

Fig. 1: Everyone else (who isn't Jewish or whatnot) at xmastime.


Fig. 2: Me at xmastime.

Get the picture?

A loooot more grinchiness.

Cindy, I know you read my blog.

[gchat excerpt from this morning] 

Colin are we going to get an election blog post through a lesbian lens?
me hmm
i hate the election and i’m gay.
there’s the post.

OK people, calm down for just a minute and give me a chance to clarify that statement.  It was one of those heat-of-the-moment things so perhaps it didn’t come out quite right.  What I was really trying to say was, “I strongly dislike the number and frequency of harassing election-related phone calls (many robocalls, some real [college junior poly-sci major] people) I have received over the past several weeks due to being an unaffiliated voter in a swing state, and society may consider me gay, but I don’t like labels–there’s a spectrum, you know!”

Phew.  I guess emotions are running high–or, for lesbos (and [including?] Hx), “higher than usual”–right now with all of this election anxiety.  In case you were wondering, yes I did Barack the vote today (Colin: I was Biden my time waiting for you to tell me that).  I know my vote doesn’t count (I don’t care what you say, Hx! Oh I’m sorry, I didn’t really mean that.  I do care what you say.  Every vote counts.  The audacity of hope.  Obamarama.), but there’s no way I was going to miss out on the coveted “I Voted” sticker.  If I get caught walking around town without that thing stuck to my shirt, a bunch of hippie college kids just might feel the need to beat some social consciousness into me with their bong.

Anyway.  Back to the robocalls.  The following is a list of the people (robots?) who have called me lately to tell me an important message (in no particular order): Michelle Obama, Barack Obama, Rudolph Giuliani(?!), John McCain.  The following is a list of the people who have not called me lately to tell me an important message: Cindy McCain.  

I know, right!  What’s up with that?  I would have thought that Cindy would have had an important message for me regarding prescription drug addiction, or starving orphans in India, or the loneliness of marriage or something.  Well I have a message for you, Cindy: maybe if you’d taken the time to call me I would have voted differently.  But it’s too late for that now!  Listen Cindy, I’ve said this to your husband (and also to JoJo), and now I’ll say it to you: take a look at my blog title.  You feeling a little bit like that right now?  (Cindy: “We didn’t want your gay vote anyway.”)


What’s with today, today?

Brendan: you need to blog today damnit
p.s. drunken posts you regret later are acceptable and COMPLETELY appropriate

Heather: i’m riding my bike in the homecoming parade today

Shannon: cant you just get drunk at midnight
me: that’s what i did last night, and now i’m filled with regret.
Shannon: yeah you need to balance that out with a wholesome night of disney magic

Kayla: i’m assuming thingy isn’t a real word
me: it’s a real word!
Kayla: thingy is?
so thingie is spelled wrong?

Colin: can I have the link to your blog?
I don’t want to have google searches on my computer for “Regret lesbian blog”

Alexandra: are you interested in girls?

What do you guys think? I just can’t decide. (On anything. Ever.)
Fri, 17 October 2008, 1:03 pm
Filed under: Gchatterbox, Required Reading | Tags: ,

me: why am i always plagued by indecision ?!
Heather: i watched several episodes of the L word last night
Heather: i concluded that you’re a bit like dana
bc i have a cute smile ?
Heather: yeah
Heather: and she is also sometimes indecisive

Any resemblance?

Any resemblance?

Why blog or gchat about anything else?
Thu, 11 September 2008, 11:08 am
Filed under: Gchatterbox, Lezzie Celebs, Required Reading | Tags: , ,

SamRo Ready to tie the gay knot

According to New York’s Daily News, Ronson was overheard telling friends during a recent gig at LA’s Chateau Marmont “by the end of this year, my love will be Mrs. Ronson.”

Alexandra: who the heck calls their signif other my love
mejustin timberlake does!       

Alexandra: did you see this:
“Lindsay and Samantha first sparked rumours they were dating in March this year, and in May the ‘Mean Girls’ actress referred to the DJ as ‘my husband’ at the Cannes Film Festival.  
While in Cannes, Lindsay also joked the couple wanted to have a partnership ceremony at Dolly Parton’s ‘Dollywood’ theme park.”

Honestly, what is not to love about these two.