Ah, Regret.

How the Dyke Stole Hxmas, Part III: Yes, Val-ginia, there is a Santa Claus

(You thought that said “vagina”, didn’t you!  Clearly you’ve been reading this blog too much.)  OK FINE people, I’ll admit it: thanks to your outpouring of xmas-y guest posts, comments, and gchats, it has recently come to my attention that I like more things about xmas than I originally thought I did.  


[Image: Chicago Tribune.  Mad props to Colin.]

It’s like that time Charlie Brown finally learned what xmas is all about. (Except I’m probably more of a Peppermint Patty.)  Anyway, let’s see what you guys came up with!

More Xmas-y Things That Even a Grinch Can Enjoy

  • Mexican eggnog* (Shelley and Lucy)
  • Crying kids on mall-Santa laps (Shan)
  • Love, Actually quotes (Hx and Brendan)
  • Erin’s Grinch socks (Erin: “It’s like looking into a sock mirror!”)
  • Hitting little kids in the eye with snowballs (Shan)
  • Heather, the Santa Claus of Hxmas (Heather: HO HO HO)
  • Realizing that beloved xmas carol “Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas” instructs us to “make the Yule-tide gay” (Colin)

So: tequila, kids crying, and Yule-tide is gay?  
This Grinch’s small heart grew three sizes that day!

*Mexican Eggnog Recipe
[Thanks Shelley and Lucy]

6 raw eggs, beaten
2 c. heavy cream
3 tsp. ground cinnamon
sprinkle of nutmeg

1.  Place sombrero on head.
2.  Mix all ingredients well and chill.
3.  Do ten shots of tequila while waiting.
4.  Find egg mixture later, forget what it was for and throw it away.
5.  Repeat step 2 as often as needed to forget about eggnog.


2 Comments so far
Leave a comment

today I caught val fixing her hair while holding the grinch sock up to her face like it was a hand mirror.

Comment by Erin

It’s a terrible, terrible mistake, Val, but you turn out to be the fucking love of my life. And to be honest, despite all my complaining, we have had a wonderful life.

Comment by Brendan

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: